My mom, FANNY, had a message that encouraged me to be more uplifting and optimistic.

"If you have to tear someone down to build yourself up, you aren't that blankety-blank good to begin with."

She didn’t use “blankety-blank,” nor did she use current lingo. Either way, I got the picture.

Lately, I've seen a lot of posts social media that focus more on discrediting others than sharing original ideas. These posts tear other people down for their thoughts and opinions.

The problem with this approach is it tells me nothing about the person doing the posting. It only tells me what they dislike about someone else.

Leaders waste precious energy when they use their voice as a megaphone for criticism. Real influence comes when we articulate what we stand for, not just what we stand against. That’s where inspiration and cohesion take root.

To make it easy, I like to use the acronym BUILD as a reminder:

B — Believe

Speak from conviction. Share your values and vision rather than poking holes in someone else’s. I have found that it’s not as important to remind others of what you disagree with, as it is in what YOU believe.

U — Uplift

Use words that strengthen and encourage. Even in disagreement, choose language that elevates instead of diminishes. It's more empowering for us as leaders to speak words of affirmation. Be positive and talk about what you do, instead of trying to persuade others to follow you with a tactic like a smear campaign.

I — Inspire

Offer stories, solutions, or experiences that light a path forward. People remember inspiration far longer than criticism. I, for one, seek guidance and motivation from leaders to help me achieve my goals, dreams, and aspirations.

L — Lead

Model the behavior you want to see. If you want positivity and respect in your organizational culture, lead with those qualities in your own actions and communication.

D — Direct

Give clear direction. Instead of telling me who not to follow, tell me where you are going and why it matters. Recommend inspiring leaders we can follow together rather than amplifying a negative message.

When leaders BUILD instead of break down, they create cohesive cultures of belonging, value, and mutual commitment.

Leaders are wasting airspace when they spend their time telling other people why not to believe in someone else. In fact, I make it a habit to spend more energy building up others. I subscribe to the leadership definition that leaders are responsible for motivating, influencing, and enabling others to be successful.

Out of the blue, a friend sent the following quote to me. This feels like an excellent opportunity to share it with you, dear reader. Next time you’re tempted to tear someone down, remember: your credibility grows stronger when your words build others up.

And speaking of building, a special shoutout to Representative Mark M. Smith for officially recognizing October 15th as Cohesion Culture™ Day. It’s one more way we’re lifting up the message that cultures rooted in belonging, value, and commitment don’t just happen... They’re built!

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For more insight on this topic, please refer to these blog posts:

• Confidence Looks Good on You (Yes, You)
• No Time to Waste for Cohesive Leaders
• Removing the MASK in Leadership

Interested in reading more from Dr. Troy Hall? Check out my books available for purchase on Amazon.